March 22nd, 2012

wedding: kiss close-up

I'm Back!

I thought for a few minutes about how best to title this entry. A few ~punny things ran through my mind, but then I remembered why I started this blog in the first place over a year ago. It wasn't to be funny or to entertain anyone. It was to chronicle and share how I was able to channel my frustrations over a rocky point in my life into something positive and worthwhile, through the own purging of my thoughts. So with that I thought, "What do I title this? Maybe just exactly what I'm feeling like I want to say is a good starting point."

So with that, yes - I'm back.

And I'm SO EXCITED to be back, you guys. I have wanted to start blogging again for a while, but my heart was just not in it. I would take a couple steps forward and then regress, and I didn't want you guys to see me continually failing. My food journaling and fitness have not really been priorities numeros unos lately, sadly. And while I have been working at some level and am only up about six pounds from my 2011 post-half high, my mind hasn't been in that place for a long time. It has gotten easier and easier to talk myself into why I need a specific type of food at a specific moment, and that in the long run it won't make a difference if I estimate the ounces of this piece of cake, or the volume of that bowl of ice cream, or the grams of that bit of avocado. When I get to my goal and can truly say I don't turn to food or lethargy for stress relief? THEN I will know I can pack my digital food scale away. But for the next 10 weeks at the VERY least, that is not going to be happening. And I'm grateful for this consistent voice that is pulling me back to writing.

I know it will be difficult at times and unrealistic to hold myself 100% accountable (especially with some events I have coming up, i.e. a bachelorette party and a wedding), but that is where balance comes into play. There is absolutely no reason I need to be going over my Daily PointsPlus (PP) values on a normal, run-of-the-mill day. Every time someone has brought treats into the office lately, I've allowed myself to indulge. When Josh and I buy a bottle of wine, we can finish it in one sitting. Now, doing these things once in a while is OK. At the rate I've been going? Definitely not OK. And I'm not punishing myself for it, nor do I think I've done anything "bad", "wrong", or "shameful". In fact, even thinking about giving up sweets and foods I truly love makes me sad, so I will never do it.'s time for me to step back and take some control.

The past couple weeks aside, what has been saving me lately has been my running. I actually ran the Disney's Princess Half Marathon again this year, and I beat last year's time by about six minutes. And I got under 2:30:00 (2:29:12, to be exact), which was my other goal. SO stoked. Here is a photo of me before the race, and another of Josh and me after I finished.

He was SO supportive and wonderful. A couple of our friends visiting from Miami also got up at the ass crack of dawn to come cheer me on. It was the most amazing day.

Also want to say it has been a year and six days since Josh and I began dating. This really has been the best year of my life and, food and fitness challenges aside, I wouldn't trade it for anything. Here's a photo from our trip to Savannah this past weekend. We went for our anniversary and my birthday, which is on St. Patrick's Day.

There are better photos, but they're mostly on his phone. I need to get them onto le Facebook. But yeah, my hair is very red. I think I like it, but I need to give it a couple more weeks before I decide if it's right for me.

I've signed up for some upcoming races! Notably the IOA Corporate 5K (this will be my third time running it) and the Earth Day 12K. I'm really happy I have some impending races to train for. Last year I made the mistake of riding the post-half high for way too long, and...well, we all know how that turned out. ;-)


I literally screamed when I saw that it was coming to Orlando. Atlanta was the closest city they'd announced for a while, so I couldn't believe it when I saw Orlando. Ahhhh! Zombies and running - HOW MUCH MORE AWESOME CAN YOU GET!?!?!!!?! I can't effing wait. Josh and our friends Adriana and Geo are doing it with me. If you're interested in joining us, we're in the 9:30 a.m. wave.

I also have another little tiny bit of running news up my sleeve, but that will have to wait for tomorrow...

Love you all so much. Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me! Hope you're all meeting - nay, destroying - your own goals.